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Saturday, January 5, 2008


The kids watched Lassie tonight. Though, it was no version of Lassie that I had ever seen. It was some kind of foreign production. ( I assume by the accents and the fact that the setting is in Scotland) Our dear Rory was moved to tears at one particular scene of violence when a man beat a dog to death. She was angry and horrified all at once. So deeply moved by the injustice of it all. We had a nice long conversation sprinkled with many hugs and kisses.

She took much comfort in reminding me that even the dogs in this movie were acting and that none of them actually were hurt or dead "in real life". I was glad she was clever enough to think of that herself.

After the kids went to bed Dustin and I popped in the DVD of Evan Almighty (yes, I know we are the LAST people on earth to have seen the film) and enjoyed a laugh or two. The last scene where Evan and "god" are dancing in the field together found me choking back a few tears.

The theme from Evan Almighty which struck a cord in me most was the theme of man's rejection. My skin crawled in the scene where "god" stripped Evan of his regular clothes in front of everyone and revealed Evan before congress in his "Noah clothes". Evan then admitted in front of everyone all that god had told him to do. Everyone mocked him and was disgusted by him.

It was such a dramatic and moving scene to me. Partially because I have, at times and in much less dramatic ways, experienced the angst of sharing what I knew to be God's desire for my life to others and having them look back at me as if I were crazy, laughing me off a bit. Or, even worse, not listening to me at all... just sorta staring right through me as if I were a window. I've been stung by rejection before, to be sure.

Oh yes, and my flesh grew very uncomfortable at that point. Why..... Matthew 16:24 If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. The hero Evan did just that.

If only you could have read the thoughts running through my mind. Trying to determine the breaking point of my pride and the beginning of my willingness to bend my knees to the pleasure of God's perfect will in spite of man's biting rejection. Have I truly done that? Like the Limbo: How low can I go? What am I willing to suffer to accomplish Christ's will for my life?

After heading to bed and praying for the evening with Dustin another old movie was recalled to my mind. The first movie I ever cried over, and a bitter cry at that! The Elephant Man. Whew, talk about a humdinger of a tear jerker! I must have been around 7 or 8 at the oldest. I sat down with my grandma, aunt and mom to the film, which contained themes largely over my head. Oh, but not the rejection, evil and injustice. We all know those when we see them don't we?

It was right at some intense scene of suffering on the part of our dear Elephant Man ( I can't recall the specifics because I never again subjected my heart to such torture as it endured watching that film the first time) and I believe some men were beating him. I am not sure. All I can remember is hating the sheer cruelty of those people mistreating the Elephant man. Hating their insensitivity to his obvious worth and the injustice of it all. That big fat meanies should be able to carry on like that and NOT get spanked was beyond me! I refused to be consoled and was in complete hysterics for at least ten minutes. (probably more, as I've been reminded many times that throughout my childhood that I could really turn the water works on... if ya know what I mean. wink, wink)

Already, by the age of 7 or 8 I had come to understand that the world could be a mean place, that injustice abounded ( just ask any three year old who doesn't get what she wants about injustice!) but I don't think I had ever encountered such a vicious display of it before that point, or if I had I hadn't yet had the ability to recognize it for what it was nor comprehend it. Nope, for me, The Elephant Man was an awakening of sorts. One I have never forgotten.

I don't have the time (especially this early in the a.m.), or quite frankly all the answers to wrap up neatly for myself all the issues I seem to be trying to process related to the themes of these movies and the cords they've struck in me tonight. One thing I am glad of is that now some twenty years later I do have a much greater understanding of Hope and of the Joy set before me which compels me to pray that the Lord would indeed make me to stand firm against my fears and temptations and to take up my cross and follow Him wherever He would have me go!

To me taking up our crosses is what being BOLD is all about.


The Montee's said...

You are not the last...we haven't seen Evan Almighty yet...we need to get on it!
Congrats on all the recent happenings w/ the paperwork shuffle! Wonderful!

Stacey said...

We haven't seen Evan Almighty yet either! You're not alone :o)

I've never seen the Elephant Man movie either. In fact, I don't know that I even know what you're talking about.

Sounds like they really struck a cord with you though. Some great deep thoughts on your part that have me thinking for sure!