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About Jen

I’m just a regular Jen. I've been married for almost 11 years now to the absolute love of my life. Daily, I am summoned to the call of “Moooooooom” by 4 (soon to be 5) indescribable blessings who came to me through birth, and adoption via the beautiful country of Ethiopia.

I’ll admit it; I’ve always liked order. If control is an option on the menu then, yes, please! I’ll have some. The thing about me is, I'm the uptight first-born of two parents who were never accused of being laid back a day in their lives. A rule follower by nature and a lover of normalcy from the earliest age (which, has always been elusive with me) meant I was especially inclined toward fear before I could spell my name.

I always say that, while I’ve faced many challenges, there are many more people who have successfully overcome more daunting trials than my own. It’s just that it seems like my struggles have been perfectly tailored by a Master to exacerbate my fearful tendencies and expose my character weaknesses.

The short list of things that have either directly affected me or those closest to me is, divorce, domestic abuse, sexual abuse, drug use, miscarriage, mental illness, poverty, starvation, and HIV/AIDS to name a few.

To see it all in black and white, listed as I have done, things look pretty bleak. The facts alone, without the story that goes along with them, make my life look worse than a poorly written soap opera.

The funny thing is I have a strong suspicion I’m not alone in this. I bet your list would look pretty crazy, too, if you listed the challenges you’ve had to face in life. I think it’s just the cost of doing business in this world.

This cost was more than I could afford to pay. My ability to deal had met it's match. There was a time when fearfulness threatened to drive every decision of my life. It tormented and paralyzed me.

I deeply resented myself for being so weak, and the Master for allowing my life to unfold the way it had. This didn’t feel like love to me. I knew things could have been different if only He would utter a word and make it so. He could have made all my paths smooth and straight; just like I like ‘em.

One day Jesus offered me His hand and I finally took it. I resolved to play the game His way. He whispered to me that I could live a different kind of life; one free of fear. My rescue didn't look like I had expected it to. We didn't always walk around the fires; sometimes it was necessary to walk through them.

Over the years God has led me to understand what His love really looks and feels like. And, I’ve learned that some of the best blessings come smack in the midst of the most fiery trials.

So, now I don’t sweat it (that much). I’m no longer paralyzed by the fear of facing the hard “stuff” of life.

BOLDness doesn’t come without a fight. But I want it. Because with being BOLD I get to follow Jesus on the most awesome adventures a regular old Jen could have.

I write about some of those adventures here.

2 Corinthians 3:12-18 (New International Version)

Therefore, since we have such a hope, we are very bold. We are not like Moses, who would put a veil over his face to keep the Israelites from gazing at it while the radiance was fading away. But their minds were made dull, for to this day the same veil remains when the old covenant is read. It has not been removed, because only in Christ is it taken away. Even to this day when Moses is read, a veil covers their hearts. But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.